WEEK 14 PICKS - RALPHVIRUS

I don't have anything funny to say today and to everyone (both of you) who is muttering something sarcastic to themselves right now, eat shit. Here's the picks.

Ga Tech vs. Wake Forest - Reggie Ball is entering his season/career ending tailspin, and Chan Gailey almost looks like he's intentionally keeping the ball away from Calvin Johnson to depress his stats and make him less appealing to NFL scouts and teams. On the other side of the ball, Wake is consistent but not explosive. Their #1 QB completes nearly 70% of his passes with a 2-1 TD/INT ratio and they have 19 rushing TDs scored by 8 different players. This is not a team heavy on star power, which is maybe why people continually overlook them. For the 3rd (!) straight week, I've got the Demon Deacons for the upset.



Arkansas vs Florida - LSU had the best defense in the country. Arkansas's rushing attack shredded them. Florida's defense is not as good as LSU's. Florida's offense is inept. Urban Meyer is a whiny crybaby (Blow up the system if my current team doesn't get in the title game, praise the system when my WAC team gets to play Pitt in The Biggest BCS Joke in History). Arkansas has terrible quarterback play, but doesn't need it. Florida is running an offense its quarterback looks clueless in. The hogs will win if for no other reason than to preserve my sanity and end this crazy talk of Florida being a title contender. Besides, I couldn't take it if Florida won the NCAA Basketball and Football championship in the same year I got married. And I won't post their terrible cartoonish mascot here either.


Nebraska vs Oklahoma - Of all the games this weekend, this is the one I'm most likely to skip. I couldn't give 2 damns about either of these teams. I'm very skeptical that Paul Thompson is the second coming of some other good Oklahoma QB, and seeing Nebraska QBs put up 350 passing yards a game makes me a little dizzy. Neither team is very impressive in the very weak Big 12, but since I have to choose, I'll take the Sooners and the points.


Rutgers at West Virginia - Both teams have an embarrasing loss on their slate recently. West Virginia is playing for little other than pride, while Rutgers has a conference championship and BCS bowl bid on the line. I'd be crazy if I didn't think Schiano would have his kids motivated. The question is whether White and Slaton can run on that Rutgers defense. If Rutgers played like they did in the 2H of the Louisville game, this is a low-scoring event that Rutgers can pull out. In Morgantown, though, West Virginia has just enough to pull it out, but not enough to abuse the Rutgers defense enough to cover that spread. WVU to win, RU to cover.


Army vs. Navy - Army is really bad. Navy is better, but still not good. People who call this the greatest rivalry in college football have been drinking too much of the kool-aid. This game has had no implications whatsoever in at least 40 years except to the kind of people who write bad poetry and become sports writers. Navy takes this and runs away with the cover.


USC at UCLA - USC is on a mission right now and nobody can stop them. I watched the Texas A & M game last week too, and I know "anything can happen in a rivalry game," but I don't buy it here. USC has been a team possessed since losing to Oregon State. Their offense is firing on all cylinders and they could probably win if they put the cheerleaders on the field to play defense. In fact, it looks like UCLA has already tried that. They can't stop ANYBODY this year and I'm convinced USC will be able to score at will here. Pete Carroll doesn't seem to lose too many games when a lot is on the line, and the streak he's running right now in college football is a marvel to watch. USC ends up in the title game yet again and stomps UCLA for the cover.


Oregon State at Hawaii - Oregon State has been tricky lately, pulling upsets over USC and Oregon in the past few weeks. Hawaii has an unbelievable offense (QB Colt Brennan has over 4500 yards and 51 TDs, 3 off the NCAA record of 54), but it's important to remember they play in the WAC and have lost to Alabama (the only big conference school on their slate) and Boise State while hanging 60+ on the likes of Utah State, Fresno State, Lousiana Tech and Idaho. Oregon State is a total enigma, beating USC but losing to Boise State, Cal, Wazzou and UCLA. I'm going to give the Straight (I swear we're not gay! The rainbow is...fuck it, let's just drop it) Warriors the nod because of the horrendous trip OrSU has to make and because Hawaii is going to chuck it all over the field so Brennan can have that record. Hawaii takes the game and the cover over the sleep-walking Beavers.



Special Thanks to http://www.sportslogos.net for the logos. Awesome site.