POINSETTIA BOWL PAYOUTS AND LAS VEGAS BOWL LINES

Watching this game got kind of creepy after awhile. Garrett Wolfe got stuffed, like I thought, and TCU was all over the NIU QB all night long, like I thought, and the NIU offense got a whole lot of nothing all night long. If it weren't for TCU's special teams fuck-ups, NIU would have easily been shut out and wouldn't have even gotten some of the chances they got. I actually don't know what was more painful: Rocket Ismail gushing about the Holiday bowl and the matchup he imagined between California and Texas while the Texas A&M logo was prominently featured on the screen (I honestly thought at first he was just saying Texas as a short hand until he started talking about the Texas QB who just announced his transfer to Ole Miss which cemented the fact that, yes, he's being paid tons of money to have no fucking clue what's going on) or watching Garrett Wolfe's draft stock plummet right in front of my eyes.

Speaking of announcers having no fucking clue, how hard would it be for ESPN to hire somebody who knew something about football in general? The festivities started early with Lou Holtz complaining about a "clipping" call on the first kickoff of the game. First thing, the block was clearly on the player's side and not in the back. Second thing, "block in the back" and "clipping" are not synonymous. Even if the block was square in the back, it still wasn't clipping. Lou Holtz has coached for 900 years and is being paid to know something about college football and not only can't recognize a legal block, but doesn't even know the proper term for the penalty he wanted called.

The whole night was painful to listen to, but I'd be remiss if I didn't point out exhibit 8,593,908 for Mark May's colossal stupidity. He was actually complaining that the referees were conferencing to make sure they got the play right. Why? Because he didn't like that they were disrupting the flow of the game. Mind you, Mark May has been one of the biggest smug bastards about how uniformly great instant replay is because it allows the refs to get the call right, even though instant replay has done more to disrupt the "flow" of a regular football game than any other introduction in the history of the game. It disrupts the "flow" so much that there are fewer plays being run on average in a given game because of clock changes that were necessary to institute replay. But God Help Us All if the refs conference for 30 seconds to make sure everybody saw the same thing.

I'm awfully bitter for someone who hit both of his bets, but the state of announcing, commentary and studio analysis has reached an absurd point. Lou Holtz is too damn stupid and old to ever have anything insightful to say, Mark May is dead wrong about almost everything he says and probably offers hand jobs to each offensive lineman before every game (he was an offensive lineman, remember? HOW THE FUCK COULD WE EVER FORGET), Rocket Ismail can barely read, is always biased, and is only halfway informed about the shit he pontificates about (I'd be careful about stepping into College Station anytime soon after the gaffe last night), Todd Blackledge couldn't be any farther up Urban Meyers ass if his name was Tim Tebow or Chris Leak, Doug Flutie is the least funny human being on the planet (he's not even funny for a Canadian, which is saying somethign) and if I get started on the 950 ways I hate Craig James, we'll be here until Vanderbilt wins a national title. Craig James is just a slightly less stupid version of Terry Bowden, and I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

PAYOUTS:

Virus -
70 on TCU to cover - WIN
100 on the under - WIN
+170 on the game for a new total of 1,170

Jeezy
30 on TCU to cover - WIN
80 on the over - LOSE
80 on TCU money line - WIN (+32)
-18 on the game for a new total of 982

NEXT GAME - LAS VEGAS BOWL









BYU (-3) vs Oregon

Over/Under
61

Money Lines
BYU -155
Oregon +135


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